First of all, I would like to wish you a very Happy, Healthy and Abundant 2009!  To ensure that this is a reality I thought that starting the New Year with a blog entry about setting Goals would be a great start.  I would particularly like to thank Gareth for inspiring me to blog on this subject.  I am not sure if you have made any New Year's resolutions.  If you have, this may help to enhance them, if you haven't then you might like to call them goals instead.  If you have made resolutions in the past and found that they have evaporated somewhere between the 3rd week of January and the 2nd week of February, then read on......

There are a whole plethora of books and articles on the subject of Goal setting and they all contribute something useful.  So what are Goals and how do they differ from to-do lists?  In my model of the world, I see Goals as the end result of my desires and wishes.  I see the to-do lists as the mechanics of achieving them on a day to day basis.  The really important thing to understand about Goal setting is that the Goals you set yourself must be: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time Specific. When you think about actually having them, close your eyes and notice what you feel inside.  If you feel a stir of excitement or butterflies in your stomach and/or a widening smile on your face, you are probably on to something worth stretching for.

It is really important that you state your Goals in the present, as though you already have them.  You should also express them in first person, i.e "I" and they should be written in language that inspires you!  I also like to use Bob Proctor's suggestion from 'The Secret' which is to use gratitude for having them.  e.g. "I am so happy and grateful now that I am 80 kilos and have a toned and muscular body".  "It is now the first week of May and I am enjoying the increased energy levels and compliments from my friends and family about the way my body looks".  Starting to get the picture?  What you have to understand is that the human mind does not differentiate between fact and fantasy, it doesn't care............so you may as well give it something really great to work with!  You should keep your Goals somewhere very visible where you will see them several times per day.  You should repeat your affirming statements several times a day and start including them into your conversations with friends, colleagues and family members. 

Remember that from the overall Goal you will then distill down some specific actions that will become 'To Do Lists' on a regular basis.  I urge you to close your eyes and daydream about your Goals as often as possible so that you can feel what it is like to actually have the thing(s) that you want and then watch your garden grow.  Having a layer of accountability is also a great way ensuring that you have some support and backing.  I have made a career out of coaching and helping my clients to keep their goals alive and in focus.  If you cannot afford a coach you can enlist the help of a friend or family member.  You can also add colour and pictures to your Goal with you in it (very important) so that you feel energised and excited by them.  Tomorrow we will take a look at some examples and methodologies of translating them into actions that will help achieve your desired results.

I hope you have enjoyed a break, if you have taken one over the festive season.  I did, I haven't written since the 18th of December.  It is always good to take some time out and do other things.  During my holiday break I was signed on to Skype the day before Christmas Eve and found a dear friend on line.  As it turned out, she was in Perth - down under spending Christmas with her parents.  We both have webcams so we got to see one another and I got to meet her mother on line for the first time.  I smiled at the thought of what was occurring.  Sat in the comfort of my office chair I am talking to, and looking at, somebody who is at the other side of the world.  I love to be able to do those wonderful things.

I shouldn't really be surprised where this friend is concerned.  We have had some extra-ordinary life experiences which have drawn us together, taken us apart again and then one day in July of 2007 after 15 years of not seeing one another something stranger than fiction happened.  I was helping a friend move into her new flat in West London when I overhead somebody taking messages off a telephone answering machine.  As my friend was talking to herself and repeating the name of the last caller on the answer-phone, to give to her landlady, I heard the name of my friend Sarah who I had lost contact with.  When the landlady arrived home and her messages were passed on, I asked her if by any chance this person called Sarah was the one that I had said goodbye to about 15 years ago at Heathrow Terminal 3 as she was heading out to India.  As it turned out, it was the very same person.  Not only that, she was best of friends with this lady that I have only met 2 days prior.  When I spoke to Sarah that evening, she told me that she had been thinking about me and she was not in the least bit surprised that I had shown up. 

You may have heard that expression that 'people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime' and I always think about this when I meet new people or are re-acquainted with old ones.  Destiny has a way of putting people together, making connections so that their work can be done.  Who would ever have believed that I could have re-established contact with somebody who I had no idea where she was.  I smile each day that little miracles like this show up and of course I keep looking for them all the more.  Look for your miracles and notice them showing up.

Isn't it great that we live in an era of technical excellence.  If you think about the infinite possibilities of being able to find out virtually anything you could ever dream of, it is mind blowing.  I love the fact that you can reach the rest of the world from your fingertips.  Borders with countries just dissolve.  You can buy products, browse picture, read and post reviews about travel experiences.  You can join a whole plethora of on-line networking groups such as: facebook, Plaxo and LinkedIn.  There has never been a more exciting time to put information on line.  Isn't it amazing now that with a broadband USB stick attached to your laptop, you can sit in the middle of a field and send and receive email, browse the web and talk to friends and do a host of other things as long as you have network coverage.

Like most things though, exercising some sensible cautions will provide you with great balance.  If you eat too much chocolate you are likely to be sick.  If you expose yourself to 24/7 information overload you are likely to feel as though you are going crazy.  What I mean by that is that if you have a blackberry or similar it is easy to become obsessed with each mail that comes in because you just have to know who sent it!  There has to be time when those boundaries are drawn and no emails are sent. 

Being able to respond to opportunities and situations instantly is truly advantageous.  Being able to strike while the irons hot is wonderful.  Being able to hit the 'power off' switch is also a great thing to do from time to time.  You can't be 'available' for so much of the waking world's time.  With no boundaries or borders there are also now no time zones as such.  The world is a global marketplace this is running 24/7 - 365.   

If you have something that you want to take care of, something that you want to communicate to somebody, why put it off?   Once you have made a decision to do what you really want to do, then take action and make it happen.  You'll look back on many things and realise you could have done many things sooner.  That can also be considered along side  Eckhart Tolle's ethos of "you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now".  His book is called "The Power of Now".  You may want to read it sometime.  I think the old expression is "why put off until tomorrow what you can do today".........somebody had a point.  It is called the instant human communication.

If you could have absolutely anything your heart desired, what would be your ideal present?  What immediately springs to mind?  Are you finding it hard to think of something?  The truth is, what is ideal today is going to going to change tomorrow.  If you have children you will be all too familiar with this concept.  If you don't have children, think back to a time when you were one yourself.  If you are out shopping right now for Christmas gifts, how do you decide what the ideal present will be for you to give this Christmas.  Do you take time to carefully research what your loved one or friends will actually want or do buy based on your own preferences and hope that they will like it? 

Often the greatest results can be achieved from 'standing' in that person's shoes and imagining what is important to them.  What would be an ideal present for them?  What would they attach value to?  If you run a business or you sell in any capacity, this is a strategy that you would do well to master.  I can recommend a brilliant book called 'Influence, Science & Practise' by Dr Robert Cialdini.  If you are interested in finding out what influences people's decisions, then this book is fascinating.

Are you happy where you are right now?  This is another kind of ideal present - the 'here and now'.  I know a number of people who pack so much activity into their day, they never really get the chance to experience the present because they are forever planning for the future.  I like to make an important distinction between human beings and human doings.  We are of course beings, yet we so often forget the being part.  We are locked into doing.  If you don't spend much time in the present, how will you ever know if it is idea or not (apart from the times when you take a long overdue holiday and you experience lying in the sun and feeling the warmth on your body).  If you don't like your present and it is far from ideal, then you need to do something to change it.  If you don't then you have to be responsible for the consequences of putting up with something that is not idea. 

Give yourself an ideal present this Christmas and write down some goals for the year ahead and get into the mindset of actually having the the thing, person, opportunity, windfall or job that you want.

I noticed something familiar yet uncomfortable this past weekend.  We ventured out in the pouring rain to Chiswick in West London.  It was one of those unavoidable visits to the supermarket, coupled with a notion that we might pick up a Christmas tree.  Admittedly, 12 mid day is not the best time to venture out.  Most people by then have surfaced after a long sleep and have decided to do exactly the same as we did.  It became apparent that we had made a bad choice when we drove endlessly round and round the car park at Sainsbury's looking for a car parking space.  I am fortunate that my partner is a much more placid driver than myself, as I Would have probably given up after 10 minutes.  Needless to say, we found a space and hit the supermarket.  I noticed that people had a look of madness about them.  Probably the combination of a busy week at work and then the added pressure of having to buy things for the festive season and battle with the hoards of other people doing exactly the same thing.  We shopped quickly and left!

The next stop was B&Q in search of a Christmas Tree.  Standing in the pouring rain, trying to imagine how the tree may actually look without the netting around it, we decided to abandon the idea and use the beautiful artificial tree stored in the roof at home.  A few ecological ticks in the box, a bid to save the planet and a few quid saved made the decision as easy one.

I began to wonder about the season of goodwill and also wondered if the credit crunch scare mongering had actually impacted people to the degree we are being led to believe, after all, there was no shortage of people out shopping.  There still seems to be a prevailing mentality that the stores are going to close for a long period and that there will be a shortage of food.  Crazy but it's true.  Old habits die hard it would seem.

For some of my clients Christmas is a bigger ordeal.  For those who have eating disorders or are struggling with alcohol dependency, this can be a very frightening time.   The social ethos of over indulgence in food and wine makes for a challenging time for some.  It is also a tough time for people who may have strained relationships within family units.  Often groups of people are forced together in an emotionally volatile environment.  So how do you survive the madness of this next 2 weeks?  Firstly remember that you can exercise your freedom of choice to be with who you like for how long you choose.  You don't have to over eat or be fearful of what is being pushed at you.  Make your boundaries clear.  If you need to keep sobriety as a focus, tell people you are on antibiotics and you cannot drink.  Avoid putting yourself in stressful situations where you feel you may be challenged unnecessarily.  Above all be vigilant about the people around you and remember that this can be a challenging time of year for some.  This is but a snapshot in time that is marked by some old traditions, this too shall pass and normality will prevail again.

Now the XFactor TV show in the UK may not have been everybody's cup of tea, however, having watched the finale on Saturday I was so very impressed by the winner.  It seems that each year the talent just gets better.  The winner of this years show is an amazing young woman called Alexandra Burke.  She tried out for the show 3 years ago and was sent home during the pre-show qualifying rounds.  Some people may have taken that kind of rejection very badly and given up on their dream.  She didn't do that, she took time to perfect her voice and focus on what she wanted to do..........to win!  She is undoubtedly one of the most talented singers I have seen in a while.  Her performances throughout the show were flawless.  At just 20 years old, this girl now has the most amazing future ahead of her. 

So what does it take to unleash the winner in you?  I believe there are a number of key ingredients such as; - ambition, determination, passion, focus, humility, fun and self belief.  Being passionate about what you do is perhaps the strongest driver.  When you are passionate about something you will find that your energy flows abundantly and freely.  What are you passionate about?  What have you won so far in your life?  What does winning mean for you?  When you slip off into a nice daydream, what do you daydream about?  What excites you?  What can you imagine yourself doing?  Now how much can you exaggerate that in your mind?  Go on, double the imagined feeling and then multiply that good feeling by 10!  Now how are you feeling?

Getting clear about your passion, ambition and motivation is pivotal to unleashing the winner in you.   When you are operating out of your passionate state, time will have little meaning.  Hours will just roll by on the clock and you may find yourself 'lost' in the very thing(s) that you truly love doing.  It is important that you get encouragement along the way too.  Surround yourself with supportive people who you know will back you every step of the way.  Think about some of the things you may have told yourself were unattainable in your life because of some knock back you might have had.  Remember that people have opinions and will freely express them.  If you are truly passionate and determined about getting what you want and winning, you will quickly realise that people's opinions are just information and the only one that really counts is yours. 

Having run my own businesses for the past 7 years I have learnt a thing or two about marketing.  The first major breakthrough is to understand what marketing is.  Simply put, I believe that it is any activity that generates sales and awareness about your product or service.  In the past when I have been running the Life Coaching Handbook Diploma course with Curly Martin at the Achievement Specialists in Bournemouth www.achievementspecialists.co.uk I have enjoyed sharing my experience and expertise with delegates who are setting up their own businesses.  I often smiled when I asked the question "can somebody give me a definition of marketing?". I was always careful to check who I had in the room and asked any marketeers to keep me 'honest' throughout the module I was delivering.

When I worked in corporate life there was always a divide between the sales function and marketing function.  The marketing department proclaimed that they sold a 'dream' to the customer.  It was the salesman's job to deal with the reality!  As I used to work in a highly technical environment that theory was often tested to its' limits as solution selling was dependent upon giving the client an accurate description of what the product could or could not do.  If you are wondering what does all this have to do with me.......well, read on.

The truth is this, whether you are self employed or pay-rolled or if you are building new personal relationships, you need to market yourself.  People need to know what it is you are offering, what purpose it fulfils and how it will somehow make their life better.  Coaching and hypnotherapy are easy to market because I categorically believe that everybody I see experiences some kind of improvement in their lives.  I am all about improvement. 

In the New Year I am going to be running some specific marketing seminars for small businesses so that I can share a wealth of experience about what works and what gets you noticed and brings in results.  In the early days of building a business you need to do a lot of marketing.  It is exactly the same in a new job or when you are building a new relationship.  People need to; see you, hear from you and have an experience of you.  If you have no clients to start off with, you will need to spend a 100% of your time marketing your products or services.  As your business grows and develops that slides down to somewhere between 30 & 40% of your time.  The key message here though is this - you need to keep doing it!  It is not rocket science but often overlooked.  What are you doing on a regular basis to make sure that you, your job, your product or service is in full view?  Who needs to know about you who doesn't already?  How could you reach them?  What opportunities do you have to address as many people as possible?

Have you noticed that in times of difficulty people pull together and produce some extra-ordinary results?  The war spirit of the 1940's during world war II produced some amazing feats of achievement.  People pulled together to help one another, in fact complete strangers.  The widening economic crisis that is being pushed down our throats every day will probably produce some similar results.  The interesting thing is that those who are most likely to respond and pull together are those who have had the least to do with the gluttony and irresponsibility of financial institutions and misguided spending by a questionable government,  yet they are the ones who are now most affected by it.

I have included a similar thread in a previous blog and I particularly wanted to revisit it today as I think it is a good opportunity to create some good energy.  The first thing you have to appreciate is that fear is contagious.  At this time of year people catch all sorts of things.  The season of goodwill means that people are sharing presents of the viral variety, i.e colds and influenza.  If you could harness the war spirit, what you would do differently to make a difference?  For the UK readers of this blog you will no doubt realise that Britain is being portrayed as the 'poor man of Europe' and indeed that extends globally.  The pound is at an all time low against the Euro and a basket of other currencies.  How do we know this?  Well we have news feeds, web sites, TV bulletins, newspapers.  They are all peddling the fear, uncertainty and doubt. 

Remember what happened on 9/11?  The horror of the terrorist attacks in New York were piped into the homes of people around the world, instantly.  Consider for a moment what kind of energetic impact that created.  Think about how many people actually became fearful in that moment and how that negative energy pulsated around the globe.  How would you perceive the current economic climate if there was no TV coverage, no radio news bulletins, no Internet and no data feeds to your mobile phone?  Other than buying a newspaper, how much fear could be created?

Gluttonous behaviour cannot go on indefinitely.  How much shopping can a person do in his/her lifetime?  How much food can be consumed over a period of a week?  How much bigger can the Behemoth's of commerce get?  Is there perhaps a trade off between convenience and thrift?  When I was a young boy living on an RAF base in Cyprus, I remember that there was a thrift shop on the base that was like an Aladdin's cave.  People sent all sorts of great things there and it was always exciting to sift through the bargains.  Charity shops are allegedly making record profits right now as people are getting into the habit of buying second hand goods.  The even better news is that those profits then go to help less privileged or needy people.

Think about spreading some gratitude and inspiration around and talking about it regularly to everybody you meet.  Simple gratitude is a wonderful way of spreading positive energy.  Here are just some of the things that I am grateful for:- the food I have on my table each day, the roof over my head.  Clean hot and cold running water, clothes that keep me warm, a wonderful partner to share my life with, abundant health, amazing friends, a fabulous place to see my clients from, optimism and the ability to see the good in most situations and a belief in the good of my fellow human beings. 

I once heard it said that disappointments come from unfulfilled expectations.  It is rather stating the obvious isn't it?  If you examine that statement in a little more detail there are some valuable things that you can take from it.  I find the word 'dissapointed' to be quite an emotive word.  I wonder if you can remember the feeling when a parent or teacher told you that they were disappointed in you?  I can certainly remember feeling the weight of those words when I arrived back at school one day in a police car with 2 friends.  We had decided to take the afternoon off, rid ourselves of our school ties and head into the town centre, and I believe we also lit a cigarette along the way.  We were after all 15 years old and knew what we were doing.  One of the female police officers who apprehended us en route,reminded us that we were wasting good tax payers money, inluding hers, by playing truant.  We were met in the main entrance hall of the school by the deputy head.  I was one of his favoured pupils up until that point.  I had been a model student.  When he told me that he was disappointed with my behaviour, I remember feeling a heaviness, the likes of which I had not experienced in a long time.

The feeling of course was that I had let somebody down.   It was as though a divide had been crossed that could never be again bridged.  Why?, because I altered a perception that somebody was holding of me.  What could I have been responsible for?  Well for starters, preserving my good name and of course not putting myself in a risky situation would have been a good choice. 

If you stand in the shoes of the deputy head, you will no doubt notice something different.  Whilst he could not have controlled the outcome of what just happened in that incident, he certainly could influence the improbability of me ever doing that again.  He also controlled my emotional state as he knew that I was somebody who liked to please others.  He also probably reflected on his years of teaching and realised that teenagers like to get into trouble from time to time.

When you are dealing with your own disappointment it is helpful to get very clear about what is fact and what is fiction.  If you don't get what you want, you might want to examine if your expectations were realistic in the first place.  Did somebody categorically agree that they would do something when they said they would?  Did they agree a time frame by when it would happen?  Is it really a wish on your part or can you control the outcome?  If you can't then you need to find a way of letting go.  Sometimes not getting want you want, or what you thought you would get, is a valuable lesson about dealing with facts and being responsible for the outcome, or to put it simply, your ability to respond. 

When was the last time that you felt abundant in anything?  What does abundance mean to you?  How would you know if you had abundance?  What would you be feeling, hearing, seeing, tasting and smelling?  If you have clarity about the answers to all of those questions then you are about to step into a much more resourceful place.  Every book that you are likely to read about the laws of attraction, be it 'The Secret' or 'Cosmic Ordering' or even Esther and Jerry Hicks' book 'Ask and It Is Given' will remind you about the importance of feeling the very thing that you want to manifest.

If you are not a natural kinaesthetic person (feeling person) then this might take a little more work.  By the way, for me, abundance is a feeling of having, and expecting infinite, wealth, success, happiness, joy, health and inspiration.  I expect that things will just come my way.  Like waiting for the postman to deliver an exciting letter that contains great exam results, a job offer or notification that I have just received a large sum of money.  Expectation of good and limitless things is a great way to attract abundance into your life.

There are lots of ways that you can feel abundant.  One might be to wear something you know you look and feel good in.  It might be wearing an expensive watch or piece of jewellery that just makes you feel great.  It may be going to eat at a restaurant that is particularly nice and not being concerned about the cost, simply feeling abundant and enjoying the experience.  In the lead up to Christmas we are encouraged to buy, buy buy.  It is a great time to exercise a little abundance and also to get clear about what kind of abundance you want in your life.  I remember the song title of a track on an old 1980's Frankie Goes to Hollywood album that said 'live your life like a diamond ring'.  I like that concept.  Are you inwardly focused or outwardly receptive to wealth and abundance.  If you are inwardly focused, do something today, tomorrow and every day this week for the rest of this month that gives you an experience of having abundance.  Then double, that feeling, treble it and remember to keep brining it back as often as possible.  It works!